Jesus, my precious firstborn son,

It has been such an incredible joy to have you in our family. You have brought such peace to our household. And it all began when Joseph and I were still just engaged. I was working for my mistress, Sarah, when an angel appeared before me. I was frightened, as you can imagine. I had never seen an angel before and all of a sudden, there he was. He was very kind and reassuring.

He told me, “Don’t be afraid, Mary. You have been chosen from all Jewish girls to have a special baby!”  He said it would not be just an ordinary baby, but a baby that would be placed in me by the Holy Spirit. When he told me I was going to be the mother of God’s Son, the Messiah, the one the prophets had written about many years ago who would come to set God’s people free I nearly fainted. When I was young, my friends and I would sometimes talk about the possibility of who might be the one to carry Messiah, to be the virgin foretold by Isaiah. I never imagined in my wildest dreams it would be me! What an honor I am not worthy of!

After the angel was gone, I went to talk about this to my Aunt Elizabeth because the angel said she was going to have a baby too, even in her old age. I loved the opportunity to talk with her since my own parents were no longer living.

In the meantime, I had to figure out how to tell Joseph. I was sure he wouldn’t understand. And he didn’t. But he was an honorable man and respecting me very much didn’t want to have me endure the shame that would definitely come in the community. But an angel appeared to him as well and encouraged him to take me as his wife because this baby was not from any ordinary man, this baby was from the Holy Spirit. The angel even told him to name you “Jesus” because he said you will save our people from their sins.

So, Joseph took me into his house and we lived as husband and wife but without an intimate relationship. Then, shortly before you were due, Ceasar Agustus decided that everyone should be counted and taxed according to ancestral connections. So we had to head to Bethlehem, home of Joseph’s ancestor David. By that time, I had less than a month before you were due. That trip from Nazareth to Bethlehem was long and uncomfortable riding on a donkey all the way. When we got to Bethlehem, the town was packed with people and I was tired. There was not one empty bed to be had. But one kind innkeeper who saw my advanced condition told us we could use his stable to spend the night. At least it would be warm and dry.

It was that night you decided to make your appearance. I had witnessed many animals giving birth in the stables of my master, but I had never thought about the animals witnessing the birth of my baby. It was like they knew what was going on; they were very quiet and took it as a matter of nature. I cleaned you up and wrapped you in some soft cloths I brought along.

Now, what were we supposed to do? We had no bed for you, but one of the horses nudged Joseph’s arm and showed him the manger. It was as if the horse was saying, “It’s o.k. We won’t bother the baby there.” Then the animals started making their soft contented sounds, the cows were lowing, the horses were softly whinnying, the cat was purring, the doves cooing, like they were singing a lullaby to put you to sleep.

Pretty soon some shepherds came to the door. They asked if a baby had been born here. Some angels had appeared to them while they were taking care of their sheep outside of town. We invited them in, and they fell on their knees and worshipped you. It was an awesome moment and I tucked it away as a memory to be remembered always.

Some days later, the town cleared out quickly and we were able to get a room in a house nearby. It was there a little while later that we got some more visitors who heard about your birth from unusual circumstances. Some men from the East who studied the stars, saw a special star in the sky the night you were born. They had read about a special star that would appear which would indicate that the king of the Jews was born. So they followed that star to Jerusalem where they stopped at the palace since this was supposed to be a baby king, but got information from the priests that the king of the Jews was to be born in Bethlehem. They finally found us when the star led them right to our house. They brought some unusual gifts for a baby – gold, frankincense, and myrrh.

The arrival of these men in Jerusalem and their questions stirred up Herod’s jealousy so that an angel warned us to flee to Egypt where we lived for a few years until Herod died. During that time you were a wonderful baby, so good and such a pleasure to watch and to cuddle. You brought us so much joy. When an angel appeared to Joseph to tell him that Herod died, we moved back, but this time to Nazareth where Joseph could pick up his carpentry business again. It was then that I heard about all the babies that had been killed by Herod and I felt so bad for their mothers. I couldn’t imagine the grief they experienced.

As you grew, you loved to follow Joseph around and to help him any way your little hands could in the workshop. Eventually Joseph gave you more and more little projects you could handle, and you actually got pretty good. You also had your little neighborhood friends you liked to play games with in the street, and I would worry about you getting run over by a chariot or wagon coming through. Your friends’ mothers did not understand me. They would talk about all the naughty things their boys were doing, and I wouldn’t join in. I think they thought I was smug or proud or something. It wasn’t that. I was actually very humbled by the fact that I didn’t have anything to say, not because of our great parenting skills, but because of who you are.

Now you are turning 12 years old. Soon we will be taking you on our regular trip to Jerusalem. You will meet the priests and scribes for the first time, and I just have a feeling I will be losing you. My name is Mary which means bitterness. I was scared when we had to flee from Herod, but I feel like my bitterness is just starting. I’ve studied the prophecies concerning you and I am dreading all the things that will happen to you. You will become a great man with a great following, and my parenting position will fade into the background. You will suffer many things, and I will suffer right along with you because you will always be my firstborn son. I won’t understand everything, but you will, because you are God and I am not. I will always support you in everything that you do and I will entrust you into the hands of our loving heavenly Father.

I love you, Jesus.